jack nicholson... yeah i would take that

Why would Larry Sanders be on Character You Love to Hate on TVLand's Top 10?

I don't hate Larry. I like Larry. Perhaps that's the problem. hahaha

so anyway today was a busy day:

1. woke up at 10!
2. drove to dunwoody!
3. took survey on sports clothing! Got Paid!
4. drove to chamblee!
5. picked up eddie from car fixing place!
6. chick-fil-a lunch!
7. went to see about new beach. com job (ray riticher's aunt. sounds good. thanks amanda and mrs. meng!)!
8. drove to decatur so eddie could buy new smog cd!
9. sam's club so i bought Golden Girls season 2!
10. Kroger and got ginger ale mismarked for free! ok!
11. Make Salsa with Eddie and then eat dinner!
12. Find out that Tullis is definatly going on roadtrip!
13. Hopefully last knife selling appointment ever!

Nice Day. Getting Tired of the weather but I don't care. Tomorrow should be good too. And the roadtrip shall be golden. I bought Travel Size Guess Who! From Target to remake my childhood!! yesss...

suddenly everything has changed

Law and Order: SVU Sunday? ok.

Right now I'm watching this one about this old man who gets his "johnson" cut off on a subway platform by some people who live under the subway and are controlled by this guy named Lucifer. But now it turns out that the guy who is now without his manhood keeps women in a dungeon. hmm... interesting episode. Watch out New Yorkers lots of perverts living under the subway.

Last night I went to that house in Dunwoody off Spalding that they kept building on to and onto until they ran out of money and were vacated. Extremely strange, but intersting to gawk at.

I also lost my Blockbuster DVD on Friday night. oops. the search continues.

I bought a dress yesterday. It looks like the upholstery from my living room couch. And I love that.

good news!

My phone is broken but I put my SIM card in my dad's old phone so I do have a phone, but I don't have anyone's number so you know. haha oh well.

on other good news:

1. the Longest Yard was surprisingly entertaining and funny. I recommend it.
2. I finally updated my pictures and you can see them by clicking on the link to your right that says "pictures."

la la la la live for today

hahaha here we go again

so today was particularly pleasant, and I hope it was true for you too.

Canoeing down the river? ok.

Tullis' blog made me remember that I REALLY need to get my hair cut.

And I never built that fucking dvd shelf.

The selling knives job wants me to go to some 6 hour meeting on sunday, but i say no thank you man with acne.

am i still watching fat actress? yes.

is there still time to go up to blockbuster?yes

do you want to? no

how bout reading? yeah

my skin is peeling off my stomach, its so creepy.

this was boring and im going to watch some golden girls bitches.

things to do tomorrow:
go to library
go see longest yard with eddie (for review)
get shelf
get bank business finished
get hair cut


something fun perhaps should be thrown in the mix.

oh also my phone broke in the river so if you need to contact me, you know good luck.

my hair... it smells

sometimes i think that i smell bad but actually its just my hair. And then I reflect:

Katherine, would you prefer your hair to smell at night or for you to smell at night?

hey kirstie allie I'm watching fat actress. and it makes me kind of sad. i should start exercising.

hey tracey chapman you've got a fast car fast enough that we can drive away. well not you and me but you get the point.

ok plans for tomorrow:

build dvd shelf finally
pretend to call people to schedule apts i will never go to
sales meeting
sleep alot
take ted on a walk
dye hair
think of you reading this yawning.

i cleaned ALOT yesterday. and bought alot of books today. maybe ill read tomorrow. yes, its a plan.

you've got time on your hands

I went to see Monster in Law today. I wish it had involved more Jane Fonda and less JLo. I don't like Jennifer Lopez.

This has certainly been a week for partying. And they were fun, and thanks to holly and callie for being good hostesses. and that is all about that.

and to tullis, the link to the right of this post that says pictures should lead you to my webshots, but if it doesn't then my username is eltonjohnlennonlady so you can look them up that way.

right now im watching you've got mail. after monday my job selling knives is pretty much just a waiting game of when will i get my free stuff and checks. so i need to start looking for a job. ive grown tired of the baby's room.

I want to build a shelf to keep my dvds on. mostly to see if i can. perhaps i will work on plans for it tomorrow.

but ive grown tired in general so i must retire for the night.

just the norm... sacrificed a few virgins, drank some kool aid

So today was pretty sweet...

1. I got my base burn so i can burn with ease the rest of the summer
2. I saw Callie, Jenna, Megan, and Lily!
3. I bought this half sweater thing at Charlotte Russe
4. I was on the Southeastern Region Newsletter for my first weekend of sales
5. I booked the hotel for the roadtrip
6. I ordered Pete and Pete online
7. I rented Eyes Wide Shut
8. I went to Towne Centre Malle
9. I offered the bird to 3 fellow drivers
10. I only called two people bitches after I hung up the phone! Were you one of the lucky few?

Yeah so my body aches from this sunburn. It's so ridiculous because my skin was so pale so I don't know what I was thinking going out in the sun at the peak of the day. Oh well it was beautiful weather and it felt so good.

I had never been to Town Center. And it had more to offer than I expected. Note to self: Stop spending money asshole. Babies don't cost money, they make money. I should have a baby to make more money! Great Plan. Oh jerri, and oh katherine.

Hey Katherine. Yeah? Hey Katherine. Yeah?

Why don't you rent some creepy sex movie with two people you hate?

Ok, I know just the one.

My poor little dog Ted has to get surgery tomorrow. Reasons:
1. To be fixed
2. To remove the mites from his ear

Point 2: Never let a dog you care about stay in a kennel.

Plans for tomorrow include:
1. waking up 9ish to call in to mofo work
2. going back to sleep
3. shower light packing
4. sell eddie knives
5. return home
6. drive to furman to see holly.
7. I hope that wasn't supposed to be a surprise
8. ruin holly's surprise
9. sleep in the car because everyone hates me for ruining the surprise
10. walk home

how am I not myself?

ok because I feel this blog has become a downer lately, and I do not wish to subjugate you, my gentle readers, to such filth I shall list all the pleasant things I can think of right now:

1. bright tulips
2. new shoes
3. comfortable shoes
4. knee socks
5. argyle
6. my school sweater
7. ted, my dog
8. his hamster wheel
9. cereal
10. alcohol's effect
11. pete and pete coming out on dvd tomorrow
12. i really want to make it 15
13. quitting something you hate
14. rubbing an itch
15. sleeping with no alarm

yeah yeah definatly sleep. i want to get out of here. no scratch that I MUST get out of here.

My feelings can best be expressed by the inner dialogue of Mr. Albert Markovski.

Motherfucking cocksucker motherfucking shit fucker what am I doing? What am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. I'm doing the best that I can. I know that's all I can ask of myself. Is that good enough? Is my work doing any good? Is anybody paying attention? Is it hopeless to try and change things? The African guy is a sign, right? Because if he isn't, than nothing in this world makes any sense to me. I'm fucked! Maybe I should quit. Don't quit! Maybe I should just fucking quit. Don't fucking quit! I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to fucking do anymore! Fucker! Fuck shit!

so close to a grand day

i should rename the blog... kat's kutco korner

but thanks for all the comments and warnings hahaha

chances are im just going to sell to my family and a few friends and then take the money and run. I like the knives, they are actually good knives but they just exert way too much pressure on the sales people. I don't know that many people and I don't like making people I just sold a bunch of cutlery to to write down a bunch of people they know and then calling them. It's just kind of weird and pushy.

Chances are I'm not going to State especially for the summer because they can't get it straight with paperwork. I mean how can I try to make a whole school get its act together? I can't. that's how. But I don't know. I kind of feel like its fate that I'm not going there. I mean don't get me wrong it would be great to get ten hours out of the way but I might be able to find a school that I would actually like to spend 3 years at and get alot out of it instead of just running over and finishing in 2 at ga state.

i dunno this was a long boring entry, and im sorry for that. More less thinky more funny? entries to come.

write down 400 names fast...

So I'm really happy. and I hope it stays that way.

I found a job with vector marketing. selling knives. hahahaha

but seriously.

my boss really likes me I'm a very "strong candidate, and he wants to put me on the fast track to management"

hahahaha

so think hard on this. Can I come over to your house and cut a penny in your living room?

But yeah i'm actually really excited about it, but I already kind of feel pressured to come up with appointments but that's ok because I have to keep a smile on my face and become a positive professional person when i walk through the doors of Vector Marketing.

But its a pretty sweet deal because I get paid 15 dollars just for going to people's house for a 45 minute appointement and more if they buy.

So this guy is stalking me through facebook. but he's nice enough I guess. Maybe its all coming together, all I had to do was leave Athens.

So yeah I don't know. I still have to write down 400 of my closest friends and relatives and read through the selling spiel before I go to bed so I guess I better go.

You would tell me if I was joining a cult right?

are you judging me?

I'm at home and I couldn't be in more pain.

As a final fuck you from Athens I got bit by an ant on my big toe on my walk from my final exam to my car. I don't know how the ant got on my big toe because I was in constant motion. But they always find a way because Athens hates me. So anyway today I had to go to the doctor about it because it swelled up huge and they gave me a shot of steroids? haha...

so now my ass hurts also

but i don't care because I never have to set foot in athens again. I finished my 120 mc question exam in 25 minutes. I was the first one to finish it and i threw it at my stupid hippie professor and ran. I got a 65 but who cares? I still got a B and I knew I wasn't getting an A.

And to holly... it's strange because lately it seems like alot of people tell me other people remind them of me, and I am very interested to meet said people. But anyway yeah that's about it. Oh and lately your blog has been really funny. well always but especially lately. anyone who could go from listening to white snake to belle and sebastian in a lifetime muchless in the span of 9 hours couldn't be all bad.

and i bought the bob newhart show on dvd today. shall i view it as a mistake? I SHALL NOT!

The rest is from Amy Sedaris' advice column in the believer, you don't have to read it if you hate reading funny things:

Dear Amy,
I've been single for about a year now, after a long-term relationshipfizzled. All of a sudden, I'm starting to get those codependency urgesagain. So what's the problem? Simple: I like my independence and thefact that I don't have to answer to anyone. Especially since I'm agraphic-design major with absolutely no time for a boyfriend. Whatwould you suggest I do to suppress these unwanted feelings without theuse of pills or alcohol?
—Looking for an Out Without Slipping In

Dear Slippy,
What's wrong with pills and alcohol? Are you judging me? It kills thepain. I hate it when people start spewing bullshit like, "You're goingto have to deal with it sooner or later." Well, not really, because bythe time "later" comes, my problem will be over because of the boozeand pills. I'm not stupid.Are you selling any pills?
Amy

Facebook stalker #2

PursuingYale: hey there
imSOtired67: hello
PursuingYale: i saw you on facebook, saw you were a cutie and a single mom, thought id say happy mothers day
imSOtired67: oh thanks. but im not a single mom
imSOtired67: one of my good friends is though
PursuingYale: oh, well then happy mothers day and congrats to the lucky guy
imSOtired67: haha thanks, ill tell her
imSOtired67: wait it gets creepier
imSOtired67: PursuingYale: is it the girl on your friends list, callie?
imSOtired67: yeah
PursuingYale: ill just click the link and tell her myself;-)
imSOtired67: ok cool
PursuingYale: she is beautiful as well
PursuingYale: and married, i see a ring on her finger?

So this is probably my last post from UGA. That was the conversation I had with Facebook Stalker number 2 haha. So creepy.

3 hours until my last exam. I haven't studied yet. I don't really plan to. I gave my balloons to the girl down the hall because I didn't want to take them to my car. She thought it was a heartfelt gesture. oops well it doesn't matter I'll never see her again.

It's strange to be leaving somewhere I have concentrated so hard on hating for so long. And planned on leaving for so long. I mean I've been seeing this room empty for so long in my head its strange to see it empty in reality.

So a final fuck you to athens, I hated you alot, and you found ways to justify my hatred everyday. So thanks for that.

It's "Saying Goodbye to Athens in Style Weekend"

...Well only in Creswell 805A

The Itenerary:

1. Waffle House Brunch
2. Alot of sleep
3. Diet Coke at the SLC
4. Picture Taking at the Library
5. Spitting at the stadium from the bridge
6. Walking downtown for coffee
7. Flicking off passerbys
8. Avoiding people who are moving out
9. Drinking from paper bags on the streets
10. And one final trip to the SuperWalmart to write on the bathroom stalls

It should be quite the weekend.

streaks on the china never mattered before WHO CARES?

i loved high fidelity. in honor of the book i forgot about and because everyone else seems to be making lists of things about college here we go:

5 things I will miss about UGA:
1. Meatloaf in the cafeteria
2. guiltless napping
3. dollar movie
4. HBO
5. the bus

5 reasons those reasons don't add up to anyone ever staying anywhere:
1. I make a better meatloaf
2. I can nap anywhere at anytime
3. I haven't been to the dollar movie in 4 months
4. I'm sick of watching Toys anyway
5. I feel Marta can more than provide the public transportation experience I crave

I'm really cruisin' for a bruisin' on the math exam. I just woke up from a nap. I haven't studied at all, and its in 19 hours. Plus I'm really hungry and the last thing I ever want to do is study ever.

BUT THIS IS THE LAST TIME I WILL EVER HAVE TO STUDY MATH, but then again I believe having that same sentiment last year at this time. Remember a little thing called Pre-Calculus that bitchslapped you right up until Graduation Day? Because I do. I do.

I love the sound of fast errorless typing. It might be my favorite sound:
Top 5 favorite sounds:
1. errorless fast typing
2. boink boink from law and order SVU
3. shower
4. stall
5. singers

hahaha i couldn't come up with three more.

Least favorite sounds:
1. other people typing
2.yelling or loud talking anything loud
3. farting
4. vacuum
5. roommate snoring

because my eyes are huge i am able to see more

man alive i slept alot today!

1am - 12pm Sleep

330pm-352Sleep

5-7Sleep

Yeah I guess Claritin does make you tired, tired and lazy.

I firgured out that if I get a 94 on my Math final I can make an "A" in the class because I bombed the last test. And I can make as low as a 67 and still get a "B." But Law and Order lasted 2 hours tonight and they didn't even warn me. assholes at NBC.

I cannot wait to get out of here, or can I wait forever.

I might have found a job for the summer, I definatly found a school to go to. I'm signed up almost I guess.

Today I am disgusted by my eating habits. Today I am disgusted. Today is Tuesday I really must start studying.

this was boring. but you know beat it, just beat it.

so i went downstairs to try to study. I packed my bookbag of all things. brought all supplies needed, and of course my Ipod because I cannot even pretend to study without music.

5 minutes later:
Supplies spread out in front of me,ipod shuffle on.. complaints from neighbors.

10 minutes later:
complainy neighbor starts to ruffle papers and talk to other neighbor. i stare until he stops.

10 minutes later:
gather supplies try to find new place to study... unsuccessful...mix cocktail.

So I can't even find a freaking place to study, because lord knows I can't study in my room I'm way to distracted. LESS THEN A WEEK OF THIS FUCKING SHITHOLE

Today is the day, I think of you

Today is the last day of classes, I suppose this fact should propel me to go to my last computer class, but why break my no going to class since Spring Break streak?

I wish I was napping. I should make a tshirt that says that. Yes, will do.

Other tshirt ideas for bitchy people who like unfunny tshirts:

If I liked you, we'd be friends right now
Sarcasm is not a way of speaking, its a way of life
Do I look like a people person?

Ok I actually stole the last one from this girl on the street and I would have to agree with it. She did not look like a people person. But then again I don't know many people who do.

I hate those abrasive tshirts. And the people who wear them are always the meekest of the crowd, so then I'm like are you expressing what you can't say through your tshirt or are you wearing it ironically?

I doubt the latter.

oh well off the stalk people through the internet and do more countdowns.