the dress-- it fits!

So now im sitting in my party dress on my bed frowning. It was one frapuccino from not zipping, which begs the question why did you eat a frosty for lunch?

Because I wanted to bitch.

However, i am extremely bloated and I wish I could wear a sign explaining this instead of people just thinking I'm really fat.

Perhaps a name tag would work better.

Anyway I'm really dreading seeing people tonight that I didn't plan on seeing until a 10 or 20 year reunion. "Oh you aren't at UGA?" "Oh you hated college, but why?"

Because I wanted to bitch.

Well sadly enough that's too close to the truth. Perhaps, i will wear that other dress, I feel it is more flattering anyway. I should have washed my hair again. oh well.

I keep eyeing the pregnancy belly I made in my sculpture class. I would wear it tonight if I didn't think that Mary would actually kill me. Oh the gossip hahaha.

i hope there's a revival

so here I am alone at work waiting for the UPS guy to come. I guess I should pack this wonder wheeler.

ok done. ugh public stop ordering things.

ok one more second.

well while its printing. let's see things to do in the near future:

1. go to ikea

2. out to dinner with parents, eddie, and his girlfriend (should be interesting, first meeting of parents and Lesley)

3. Buy white gloves. hahaha

4. go see sleater-kinney

5. see callie. I haven't seen you forever.

ok well i have to go pack my 35th wonder wheeler for today. then its off to ikea. suck it!

"There's glass between us"

 

I was talking about the newspaper

i love tracking numbers... it's like im on the inside. Oh I know all about where my package is UPS. You think you're so smart, but I have you beat.

I dislike Sunday nights because its like you're caught between two worlds.

I love the fact that IKEA is opening Wednesday and I think I'm going to take the morning off from work to go.

I dislike the fact that they colorized Bewitched on DVD.

I love the fact that I'm watching it.

I love sleep. Yes, I will do that now.

abner look abner

(this entry is inspired by the new bewitched movie and is therefore the making of an entry in an entry)


(Laying in bed listening to "Y" section of Itunes types quietly "I should make a list of things you might not know about my day)

1. A lady over the phone told me I was smarter than our other employees
2. I saw Bewitched
3. I slept 13 hours last night
4. I drank Dunkin' Donuts coffee this morning

(tries to think of something to fill in 5 and remembers book sitting next to her-- looks at book)

5. started reading Jane Fonda's biograpy.
6. Decide to write Jane Fonda another letter, this one will be heartfelt and better fucking get a response

(reminisces over last Jane Fonda letter how I opened with how I am NOT related to her ex husband and how she should NOT hold my last name against my letter. Didn't work. Still unclear on why not)

7. I decided to take 12 hours online from UGA in the fall so I'm still technically going to school

(remembers the rushed circumstances of decision to take online classes, but agrees that its a good decision)

8. Read Sarah Moye's "favorite books" on facebook; her selection "I hate books" This will be my answer if anyone ever asks me again. It's hilarious. I still haven't quit laughing.

9. Laughed at "I hate books."

10. Put non slip frogs in the bottom of the tub. I think they're cute more than I fear slipping.


Oh this is a super long entry but I just remembered my dream from last night and it was hilarious. I was out to dinner on some occasion with my family and my aunt and uncle. So after dinner my aunt wanted to show us some carnival in this sketchy part of gwinett so we go over there and its all like rusted out and broken down carnival. So she leads us to the petting zoo, but all that's left is this huge ass pig and a hen and a rooster that's on steroids because its like 4 feet tall. So this rooster is like roaming freely so I'm like I'll be in the car. Then my aunt unveils her plan to purchase the carnival and everyone is like seriously are you retarded? Afterwards the rooster charges my family except for me and they cart my aunt off in a straight jacket, but right before they shut the doors to the paddywagon I can see behind her the binding to a book that had her face on it that I can only assume had her story of woe for wanting to buy the broken down carnival. i hate books.


(rereads, laughs.)

why don't you write me anymore?

Today I finalized my order at deepdiscountdvds.com. It's so cheap plus with the code "supershopper" you get an extra 20% off for the next few days. So please buy buy buy because its so cheap cheap cheap.

List of what I bought:
1. Annie Hall
2. Rushmore
3. The Back to the Future Trilogy
4. Sleeper
5. What's Up Doc


Today I might have gotten a 3rd job. It's data entry. It the neighbor at my internet job and it was a coincidence. I don't know.

Tomorrow the internet company I work for is going to be on the CBS morning show. Don't worry I'm not watching it either.

Ok that's it. That's all I've got. I'm spent. I'm watching Kate and Allie on 20th Anniversary of Nick at Nite. Nick at Nite and the Blizzard both born in the summer of 85 too much! Up next Benson, who do i look like becky? I'm no soap fan.

Did you know that if you are 20 you could have had a Blizzard for free yesterday? Yeah but it was yesterday.

That's not bad not bad at all. I have to check my library account online. Interesting fact: I know my library card number. I'm as boring as a book. I'm number one on the que for the Jane Fonda Biography from 32nd to 1st. haha.

old man take a look at my life

Mr. and Mrs. Smith huh... I liked it fine.

I made a cobbler today, for father's day. It looks pretty, but it might be disgusting. Only time will tell. It's a berry cobbler.

Laverne and I are one in the same, or wait is it shirley? Please say it isn't shirley. Quick name Laverne and Shirley's last names on the show.

Did you get it right?

Did you check IMDB, and therefore: Are you a cheater?

I have to write a check, which requires finding my checks.

Ro de o do do

I'm not getting any Ro de o do do. aww...

I wished I lived in the 50s or at least the 50s according to the 70s.

I sold two mattresses today, so that's pretty sweet.

Karma's coming round and its gonna knock her to the ground

So I'm watching Wonder Falls. I watch it whenever I'm at home and awake, and sometimes when I'm asleep.

It's entertaining, but this is alot of pressure.

Yeah the job is nice, when I'm not getting bitched out. Well that might be extreme, but I'm not used to my employer not completely loving me. It's uncomfortable.

I think I'm going to need to get a manicure. My nails look like shit and its starting to upset me. I have never really cared before, but now yes?

I want to see Sleater Kinney.

So it turns out that I don't have very many "funny" or "interesting" things to say lately. But it works out because neither do many of the people I know. Oh, but not you of course.

I think I need to see a doctor for the lump in my throat.

Now I email all my entries in, which is quite the coincidence since I've been phoning them in for years now. I guess its getting kind of late because im getting really stupid.

Gotta go.

why don't you go to the lot and sit on it: An Intimate Interview

What are you doing right now Katherine?

Eating cold spaghetti out of a Cool Whip Light container.

Where are you?

At work.

What are you wearing?

That's a little personal but ok. One of those shirts thats all rippled at the top that enhances your boobs covered by a half sweater, the one I got from target, and my Gap denim skirt.

Do you still like your new hair color?

Yes, it fascinates me and I wish it wouldn't wash out.

Well I guess you could dye it permanently.

I guess you could shut your mouth permanently.

Jeez.

I'm sorry.

So how much did you sleep last night?

6-9pm then 12-9:30 so you know alot.

That's pretty sweet.

I know thanks.

What are you going to do now?

Watch Ray eat some Italian Ice, and pray that the phone doesn't ring.

 

how to spend alot of money without even trying.

be tired, and bored, and at target oh and it helps if your mom gives you her credit card?

What?

That hasn't happened before. But it was really nice. I was wondering around looking for white shoes and I decided to buy a nightgown because i don't think i've had one since I was six. I'm wearing it right now, and its extremely comfortable.

I worked at the Baby's Room today. It was pleasant enough. Much better than last time I worked.

I almost dyed my hair tonight.

I'm reading the new Nick Hornby book thanks to Becky. It's really depressing thus far, which i guess you could have guessed from the back cover.

The baby boom starts at 8am tomorrow morn, but thankfully I just have to work until 4. I have to find a comfortable pair of shoes to wear, which is much easier in the winter, since the only pair of shoes I wear in the Summer is flip flops or ballet slippers neither of which protect my vulnerable feet.

should I paint my toenails? no. wait for it wait for it.

I'm exhausted and I have decided to devote Sunday to sleeping, since I haven't been doing enough of that lately.

I saved latin, what did she ever do?

So it's night again. That seems to happen all the time now.

I took a short nap today. I have an amazing body clock! If I think of a time I need to wake up at I wake up before I go to sleep I wake up 5 minutes before that time! AMAZING

I had some seriously effed up dreams this morning. I don't remember what they were about but I do remember being particularly satisfied for having thought up such situations.

Tomorrow if I run into the good fortune of remember my dreams I shall write them down so that I may share them with the world.

I'm watching Catch me if you can. Yep. I rented it with my nonstop rentals at blockbuster.

Work happened again today. And again tomorrow and the next day, and everyday after that until my work dies or I do.

But seriously folks I like both of my jobs. I'm not complaining.

Lately I can't remember anyone's name or anything except for Kurt Loder's name. I think its from lack of sleep.

uhh yeah... we don't have spoons

tonight Eddie and I ventured to GreenBriar Mall to the Michael Johnson theater more specifically for a free screening of the Honeymooners. We were the only white people in the theater, and this person with a camera kept taking pictures of only us. It was a promotion for "upscale" magazine. When I say "up" you say "scale"


UP

did you say scale?

UP

that's right.

So anyway i went to work at the internet company again today. And it was pleasant even. It's a good thing.
And I ate at Krystal, that's right. I'm sorry I ever went to White Castle. It was an judgement call and I failed.

We were early for the movie so we went to Wendy's where I bought a "You Pick 'n Mix Frosty" I requested Butterfinger, but they were out so I settled for Oreo. My brother asked for a spoon so that he could eat his frosty. She was like " uhh yeah. we don't have spoons." "But how can I eat this" (gesturing to Frosty). (she hands a plastic fork through sliding window) After I quit laughing I realized they had given me a straw to eat my pick n mix frosty with. Assholes. the king made things right.

I'm Suffering from PMMS -- Please Marry Me Somebody

a list of things I learned today:

1. Anne Bancroft died. And I am saddened.
2. I need to go on a diet.
3. I have been a bitch for at least the last year.
4. Sometimes not caring is just as bad as hating.
5. Jason's Deli changed their Brocoli Cheese Soup recipe!?!
6. I need more sleep than I had thought
7. I should have gotten braces
8. No one with the exception of Celine Dion likes the sound of their own voice
9. I'm not looking forward to Saturday
10. I might be dying?

Why do I find the title so funny? Because I do Bitch back off.
Why did I say I might be dying? Because my kidneys hurt.

I want to hear this is just a modern rock song so much it hurts. Let's see if the magic of itunes can help me out on this one. Score one for Katherine and itunes.

Plans for tomorrow include:
1. you
2. me
3. work
4. sleep

Wouldn't it be strange if I were a prostitute and I kept a blog? Ok I need your help on this one loyal readers if you know of any Prostitutes who keep an online journal please tell me. And they can't simply be whores, they have to receive compensation for their acts.

Yeah this day was actually nice as it laid itself upon me its just that damn hindsight that gets me everytime.

the minute you walked in the joint...

today was nice.

well i slept alot. perfect.

then i helped my mother take down the wallpaper in her bathroom. mistake.

then i went to see the new Batman movie with Eddie. Really good.

It was like the first Batman except without the Joker so it didn't scare the shit out of me. Perfect.

And I talked to the lady at the beach company and I start tomorrow at 11!

Jobs for the summer: 3

Jobs already quit: 1

Remaining Sum of Jobs: 2

PS the Nashville trip was fun, and my webshots are updated with pictures from the trip.

because i hate girlfriends and i never wanted to be one

I'm watching The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou.

I'm excited about the road trip to Nashville tomorrow morn.

I'm realizing my bed is very comfortable.

I'm also realizing that my suitcase is very much unpacked.

It's cool though. I'm sure Ill look retarded the whole weekend because none of the right clothes are clean.

It's cool i like looking bad, no really guys I do it on purpose to have this bohemian glow.

I got my hair cut by Magda at the mall today. Not too much of a change. My head hurts.

I had a very strange dream last night. It involved intense therapy.